(Reposted from : Quitting my internship because I want to change careers? : careerguidance (reddit.com) )
I (23f) graduated in the beginning of 2020 and struggled to find a job for 11 months. I've been working as a software engineering intern for the past 4.5 months and, frankly, I hate it. I had another software engineering internship back in university and I also did not like it. I thought I could stick this one out for 6 months (my contract doesn't have any end date) and see how I really feel by then but I honestly think my feelings will not change.
I don't enjoy the work at all. I wish I could just autopilot and get through my day but everything is so frustrating to figure out and I have to give it my all even though I have no interest or willpower. The thought of my projects and tasks makes me feel so defeated. Talking to my boss or his boss really stresses me out since I feel like they're constantly disappointed in me and my performance (they have told me they are). I don't enjoy programming. I don't enjoy thinking and talking about tech all the time (or at all anymore). I don't enjoy the engineering culture. I'm definitely not performing well at all anymore and most days I don't even want to get out of bed. A lot of my old depressive habits are coming back too and last night some of my own thoughts scared me. (I have an appointment with a psychiatrist soon so no worries there I guess).
I want to quit. I have a 15k savings, no debt, and a family who will support me financially so I'm not worried about the money. But I feel like I'm so directionless that if I quit I'll just waste away the years staying unemployed or working odd jobs until I'm like 30 and even more lost. I've been thinking I could quit and spend some time working a casual part time job, volunteering, and immersing in my hobbies until I get myself back together again and then try another for another career I might enjoy but I don't even know what I can do. None of my interest really align with the career path I'm on. I started learning a bit about ux design but even if I do enjoy it and learn about it, it wouldn't be for another year until I could try to look for a job I think since I have to learn and make a portfolio.
I know the typical advice is to wait until you get another job to quit but I burst into tears in front of my coworker yesterday after a pretty stressful interaction with my boss. She was chill about it but I'm starting to think I'm reaching the end of my rope. I have cried about work and how I feel in this career but never in front of others and definitely not at the office. I'm not the type to cry in front of others. My coworker has sort of become a "mentor" to me in my time here though and she asked me "You're not getting paid a lot, your family also doesn't need the money, and you're not happy here. What are you doing here?". I don't even know. I'm scared of not having a career. I don't want to stress my family out. I don't even know what else I would do with my life.
Does anyone have any advice on what I should do?
usa jobs resume
usa hotel jobs
usajobs
usa jobs federal government
usa job in ksa
usa jobs
usa jobs login
usa jobs gov
usajobs.gov
www.usajobs.gov
usajobs.com
usajobs
usajobs.gov official
Aucun commentaire: