I'm a new graduate and I'm really considering quitting my internship (it's been 4 months) but I don't have another job lined up. I'm almost done with my current project and I want to give my resignation letter at the end of this week or the beginning of next week. Am I being too impulsive? What should I do? How do I explain this 4 month stint to new employers...
This place makes me super anxious and depressed. I feel like the work is so mind numbing but also so difficult (I work in tech) that I just can't motivate myself to do it anymore and I'm falling super behind. The onboarding was disastrous and it's really showing now. My boss and his boss have all made passing remarks when I first started (like in my first week) that I was disappointing and not performing as they thought I would've and that made me super anxious to ask questions and get the help I need. It doesn't help that they speak and message in my non-fluent language (I didn't know this before I started working since they interviewed me in English but if I had known, I definitely would not have taken the job). I know, I should have been more proactive and aggressive about learning at the start but I wasn't and now I feel like I'm way too behind to properly do my work anymore. I'm so anxious everyday at work and when I think about work I feel kind of depressed. It's spilling over into other aspects of my life too. I don't want to do anything anymore. I'm getting intense anhedonia. I don't even want to look for another job anymore or play games or anything. I just drown myself in kdramas to get some emotional stimulation and then go to sleep feeling kind of empty.
Right now, I live with my parents and they are okay with me quitting. I also have some money saved up in case of anything. I just worry if I will find another tech job especially during the pandemic... I feel like I'm just running away from my problems but I honestly really want to... I tried talking to my boss but its really hard when he just criticizes me but doesn't even help. Maybe I just need tougher skin but everything just feels so hopeless at this job I wonder if it's even worth it? I don't even want a career in this field (as in this job is computer science in hardware but I don't want to work in hardware. I want to work on other computer science fields) but I was so desperate last year for a job I just took it.
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