I honestly don’t even know where to start. I just turned 20 about a month ago, and am struggling on what to do next. A few months ago, I moved with my family to the-middle-of-nowhere Arizona. I had an entree level job for an online store my dad’s friend owned, but decided I couldn’t make enough to live on my own.
I was only making $12/hr, and finding anything to rent under $1200 a month is extremely hard. And I don’t even own a vehicle, and have no way of carpooling.
I wasn’t going to school because my dad didn’t, and he always beat it into my head to not go to college unless you know what you want to do. Otherwise it’s a waste of money and time.
So anyways, I left with a good relationship with my boss, he’s a great guy, to live where I am now with no job. I could essentially get a job at a fast food restaurant, but I just think it’s basically admitting defeat and accepting that I will spend the next 5 years making 11 an hour.
My brother just scored a sweet job with a big company, and he’s already making a ton of money for his age. He basically got the job because of another one of my dad’s friends. That same company isn’t hiring anymore, even though I was taking online classes to work for them. So I just think it’s not really about what you know, it’s about who you know. But I feel like no matter what I do, I’ll always be a failure compared to him.
I have a bit of social anxiety, and heavy bouts of depression almost every day (mostly because of my situation). My parents don’t really see it, because I try to put on a show for them. I’ve definitely told them what I’ve been going through, and they’ve tried to understand, but at the end of the day, they can’t. I don’t blame them.
I’m willing to work 12+ hours a day if it means I can hold a successful job. I’d be willing to work halfway across the country if someone offers me a good job. So I just don’t know where to go for here. I guess I’m just looking for some advice? Or maybe someone on here to give me a chance.
Sorry if I wasted your time, I just don’t know what I’m hoping for anymore.
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