This could probably get wordy but I'll try to keep it short. When I was still in undergraduate, I worked for my university as an assistant. When I graduated, I got hired a few months later full-time in a different department. It was supposed to be an easy gig, and get me through a few years while I got my master's degree. The first year was a bit rocky, but I got through it despite some really bad days. I've been here a year and a half full time and it's been utter hell.
Back in November, I applied for an internal transfer. The position was closed and the supervisor for that role went out on maternity leave. Almost two weeks later, my boss and her supervisor and department director starting coming down on me for the quality and quantity of my load. Everyone at the entire organization/university knows how much work I do and that's it a lot for one person, especially in an entry level position. Since Thanksgiving break, it's been relentless onslaught. It was so bad in January that I had to take a week of sick time to deal with some neurological stuff. I was cleared to go back to work, and a week later I got put into a performance review.
HR is looped in and siding with my supervisor and leadership, but some of our HR/Talent Management knows that this is wrong and that I should defend myself. I feel so beaten down. I've went back and forth and asked them if they wanted to fire me, if this was a push-out, etc. I'm at such a loss - someone from talent management even said they knew my boss was a "tough manager" and the person in the role before me was fired. I wish I knew that before I took the role.
I'm sick to my stomach every day and dread going into work because I get attacked via email and the pressure is killing me. I've been applying for jobs since November - I got one interview, but didn't get the gig unfortunately. I know the holidays are a bad time but I've done everything. I apply for so many jobs each week, had the career advisor at my master's program review my resume & everyone agrees it's in perfect shape. I'm doing everything I can but no bites. I'm just really suffering and it's been months. I wish they'd fire me already.
My biggest problem is I don't have a car so opportunities are a bit harder that way. I just need something full-time in my area/within a reasonable distance. If I have to take time off from my master's I will, but I don't want it to come to that. Any advice/questions/suggestions are welcome because I'm at a loss and crying nearly daily. It's just overwhelming to be told I'm incompetent on a daily basis.
Thanks!
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