Agreed to a change at work, realized I’m not going to perform like I thought and want to get out before I fail

I have been at my current place of work for a year now, and overall have been happy. Up until now. Again.

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Some background information about me, I'm 19 with 1 1/2 experience as a part time sales associate at an office store, and my current role that I will explain below. I went straight for a full time job out of high school, and do not have any degrees/certificates.

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I work in an automotive assembly plant. For the first 5 months I was a builder/operator, on the same line for the entire time. I was happy with what I was doing.

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I had applied to be one of the area leaders on that same line because I was confident in my ability to do the job. At the same time, I had a co-worker who said I should apply to be, what we'll call the "improvement team". I hadn't given much thought other than I would get to work with a friend.

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Long story short management gave me the option to pick which role I wanted and, again, without giving it much thought I told them I'd like to be on the improvement team. What I failed to do is realize what I wanted, not what others said I should do.

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Almost immediately as I signed the offer letter I was in total regret, as if I had signed my life away. I don't know what clicked in my head after the fact, but I realized I wasn't going to be in the same area anymore and that really threw me for a loop. I became very anxious and lost all confidence in myself. I was waking up in the middle of the night, and could barely manage myself during the day, to the point where I had to take Xanax just for the peace of mind that I wouldn't break down. A week into the new role I essentially told them it wasn't for me and that I would like to be the leader on my line that I had been on.

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I won't ever know for sure if they were disappointed in me or not, but they had said they want me to be where I will perform the best and on the same day gave me the offer letter for the area leader, more specifically the area I had been at my entire time here. I was so incredibly relieved and excited to start the role I had originally wanted.

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Flash forward to now, I have been of of the area leaders for 6 months now, and based on what my supervisors and a couple of managers have told me, they have made recommendations for me to be a supervisor. My goal here is to be a supervisor, and I put in an application when I knew there was an opportunity. My production manager approached me last week and said that he wants me to get some experience under my belt and essentially "test" me to see if I can be one, and explained he wants me to go to a different line and get them "up to speed". I agreed, excited to get my shot at the next level.

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I started Monday, and am having the same repeat issue when I had taken the first promotion. Although it's not as severe as it was the first time, it's enough to where I need to do something about it. I'm starting to think I have a legitimate separation anxiety problem when I'm away from my original line, and I feel so stupid for not seeing this happening and refusing the offer. I'm afraid to tell them I can't do it again and upset management and dampen my chances of moving up, but at the same time I can't keep doing this.

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What makes it that much harder to reverse is everyone around me is expecting me to be the leader I was on my line and bring that here. Deep down my mind is saying "GET OUT! GET OUT! GET OUT!". I simply don't have the confidence in myself that I had on my line.

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The general manager approached me today and said he's glad I came over here. I began to explain to him that I'm looking to go back to my line he said "no no no" and essentially closed that chapter of my career right there and said that I am here to get them up to speed. I feel cornered into a spot I don't want to be in because I preformed so well on my line, they expect me to do the same here, when I know it's only a matter of time before I fail. What's really upsetting me is originally it sounded like an optional thing, and now it seems like a permanent thing. They did ask me to make sure I was on board with helping the other line, but had I known it was going to be a permanent change I don't think I would have accepted.

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I don't have the same passion/drive that I did on my line and don't know anyone nor the product they build, so it's very challenging for me to be their leader.

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I spoke to my current supervisor and he told me he thinks I am a good leader and wants to do what will make me comfortable, and I told him that me going back to my line is what I want. I feel like I am too young with too many opportunities to make a sacrifice that I don't want to make, and don't have to financially make. But like I mentioned above, I don't want to piss off my general manager by going over what he said to my face, but at the same time I REALLY don't want to stay here. I feel so stupid for doing this again.

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What I've learned about myself is that if I'm going to be a successful leader, it's going to have to be the line that I have experience in. I want to express this to my production manager but I feel like because the general manager told me I'm not going back I don't have any other options. I would hate to put a resignation notice in, but at the same time I don't want to wait for them to tell me I failed, because I know if I don't go back it's only a matter of time.

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Is there a way I can get out of this without ruining my professional relationships with management?

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