So today I lost a job I was essentially preordained for.
I've worked for 4 solid years for it and I even did the job unofficially for over a year. The hiring manager straight up told me I was his pick and I prepared for 3 days for my panel interview yesterday (which happened to be my birthday) so I was feeling good going into it.
My interview went fine. I botched one of the questions by not articulating myself as well as I could have, but my manager kind of made up for it by asking a follow up question to redirect me. I literally had everything in my favor.
Today I was notified that I was not selected for the position.
An external candidate apparently blew me out of the water so completely it wasn't even a close call despite MY manager AND HIS MANAGER arguing for me.
I am sad. It was the position I have been working very hard toward for 4 years. I loved it when I was doing it before and now I am doing something I kind of hate. That position was my way out and back back something that made me happy.
I just want to share my story with anyone who reads this to say this: It's okay.
It is okay to fail and it is okay to be sad about your failure. But learn from it and take it as an experience and a sign that you can do better. Don't get mad or throw a fit or quit over it. Use it to make yourself better for next time. Even if it is bullshit, you can learn from it.
Personally, I am taking it as a sign that I can do more somewhere else. I was so focused on the endgame of getting that position that I neglected to see the value of the journey getting to the point where I had everyone rooting for me (literally, even my subordinates). That journey gave me a stellar resume that I now plan to use to move my life into a different direction. I was kind of stuck on the path I've been on because of how some life things turned out and that position was the end of that path anyway. Now that it has been closed, I am free to move around without losing $20k/year and it feels..... freeing, in a way.
I guess my point here is sometimes you fail through no fault of your own and that is okay. If you lose out on a job or don't get an interview or, God forbid, get fired, it's okay to be sad for a little bit but then it is time to examine your journey instead of your destination and you'll almost certainly find some insight you didn't see before, whether it is a lesson or a new path, or even a new insight. It is all valuable.
I see a lot of (perfectly reasonable) sorrow on this sub so I just wanted to share my experience and thoughts in the hope it helps someone else pick themselves up.
There is a guy called Jocko Willinck on YouTube who has a short video called "Good" that I suggest you watch if you find yourself having failed at something.
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