I quit my great job to pursue another one, which ended up being a flop. I'm now at a temp job that has poorer compensation, and I could really use some encouragement

Hi everyone,

I just need to vent and get some encouragement. I graduated with my PhD in 2018 and immediately landed a great, high paying, cushy job at a Fortune 50 company (company A). I was there for 2 years and then left for a start-up (company B). Nothing was wrong with my old job at company A, except I wasn't that interested in the technology. The job itself was great though. The start-up had technology I was so excited for, and the role was my dream position. Well, long story short, it didn't work out and I left about 4 months in. I quickly started applying for other jobs and landed a contract position with another really great Fortune 100 company (company C) in a really cool industry - but it's just that, a contract position. Not contract-to-hire. If the position was with the company with benefits and growth opportunity, I'd be stoked! I assumed that I could get in on a contract basis and perform well enough to get converted to a company hire, but I learned that it doesn't really work that way.

I don't know what to do now. I'm making 70% of what I used to make, without paid vacation. I contacted my old boss at company A (I'm SO grateful that I left on great terms). He told me that they are trying to get more headcount and if that happens, I have the support of him and his boss to come back. But I feel like I just really fucked up my life and every day I have a panic attack in the morning. I could use some advice or kind words, I just feel constantly on the verge of tears and hopeless about the future. I feel like I didn't stay at my first job long enough to get strong enough experience that will translate to another job of the same caliber, and I'm afraid to look for jobs now because I don't want to look like a job hopper (it would say 2 years at company A, 4 months at company B, 1 month at company C).

Thanks everyone <3

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