I have been in my current role almost a year. From the start, things have just felt 'off.' It seemed like I was always left out of meetings, group discussions etc. Nothing concrete, but I'd never felt that way at a job before (But I am SUPER sensitive).
Then the red flags started coming in. 2nd level manager mentioned that some of my projects were 'slow', but my first line manager had said nothing. I had mentioned in passing about being left out of things and the behavior continued. Since we develop code, a lot of times we are heads down working and my co-workers would get up and go to a meeting, leave me sitting there.
First review-"You weren't a rock star, so you got needs improvement, but your recent stuff has been great" (@6 months)
Then I started to get micromanaged. We work in agile, so our product owner should set the agenda: he says "I want X,Y,Z" and its my job to deliver it, however I want. But i get messaged by my boss, who isn't even on my product team "Do it this specific way"
Quarterly Check-In. I don't actually see my review, but have to sign it (electronically). Supposedly its good.
Now we are getting code change after code change with no notice, primarily from my manager's team. I try and suggest sharing information, but am rebuffed. (My code depends on their code, but they change their code regularly without so much as a 'heads up)
My scrum master knows I am pissed. He checks in on me regularly. I've told him that myself and my coworkers are feeling frustrated and abused (key item here--side conversations with peers who both feel the same way about unannounced changes and micromanagement).
Meanwhile my 2nd level boss is so busy he missed all of my quarterly check ins. I emailed him some questions about future directions but he said we should talk and he would find a time. Needless to say, I will not be holding my breath for that appointment.
Finally there is a culture difference. This is more of a startup. People are very young, we are having an 'after party' after the Holiday party. My kids are only 2-3 years younger than some of these guys. Its not the age, its the 'going to bars', everything is about social life, travel, apartments. I am a true geek and would rather talk math/science. None of these guys have a kid older than 2, and most are unmarried. Its not a good/bad thing, but its obvious I stick out like a sore thumb.
SO I started my job search and its going very well (I am in a hot field), but when talking to my father about it he was just "Wait it out"--kinda threw me for a loop--he is definitively an older generation where work 10+ years same job was norm--I'm more than 3-4 years, but at 1 year it feels very very soon. Plus the office is a great place--are these enough red flags to say "Time for a change" or am I too thin skinned (and that's okay to say--I know I can be hypersensitive)?
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