Did I navigate this situation badly?

I attempted to ask when I can hear back from my top choice because my second choice offer is expiring soon. I sent this email after final round interviews. Does it come off as aggressive to you guys. Really worried they'll table me for this now. For a little more information it's a large consulting firm.

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Hello X,

Y is my top choice. That being said I have a second place offer expiring in less than a week. I was wondering when I can expect to hear back about Y’s decision regarding me as a candidate for an internship position. I feel strongly about Y’s culture and line of work. If possible I would love to work for Y.

Sincerely,

Catfishp00

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