So, I studied IT from 2008-2013, i landed a job as an IT technician in 2013 and left in late 2017. I entered into a restaruant in 2018 and left that in 2019. Since 2019 I've worked some part time shop assistant jobs but had nothing substantial.
I kind of feel like I left IT in a time when IT is a growing industry. I'm 26 years old, I've not worked in IT for 4 years in august this year. (i left when I was 23) I feel like trying to back into IT is going to be challenge and a part of me wonders if i'll ever get back to where I was in 2017 (when i essentially had a break down and quit my job!).
I would like to get back into Technician or administrator job. But I just feel like there is not any jobs like this in my area. I really feel like I messed up my life over the past 4 years. I want to stay in my town because my family is here, my friends and essentially it is my home. I've applied to some jobs, i do drive so travel isn't an issue.
On the bright side, i quit smoking weed after 10 years of usage. I'm managing money better and I think if I manage to find a job, i'll be much better at it. It's just I feel like such a loser that I messed up the past 4 years.
But I do just feel like It's gonna be so hard to find a decent job again. My last IT job was literally on the same street as me! It was at a school about 5 minutes walk from my house. I just feel so bloody stupid that i walked away from that job. I could of had such an easy life is I stuck to that job. Well i guess not an easy life, but in terms of employment, i could of been so much better off. Or i could of at least found a better paying job if is tayed working at that job!
I dont know, i just feel like im such a stupid idiot. I guess i don't know why I'm posting this, just guess i don't really have anyone to talk to about it. A part of me doesn't even know If I fully want to work back in IT. But when I look at my CV and see how 2008-2017 was so positive but 2017-2021 is just depressingly bare and nothing really happend.
I think quitting weed (literally 3rd January, so im still getting use to my new reality) will in the long term help me. It's just hard accepting I've made such massively avoidable mistakes i guess.
Edit:
I think for a long time, I always felt kind of safe/secure because I knew I had followed a good road in life, kept studying, stayed in IT. i knew i was good at it. It kept me feeling safe. Now I haven't done IT in 4 years and the time just flew by. Only now I'm sober Im realising I really feel like I don't really have any skills and my experience is dwindling. I should of had the last 4 years working IT and I should be working towards a semi-decent career. I feel like so many people are doing IT these days and suddenly I feel like there is loads of competition. But when I was younger it wasn't about the "competition" it just was that I was doing something I was good at. I no longer feel good at computers. I feel like the world has passed me by in the past 4 years.
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