I’ve been with my current company for almost 2 years (first company after I completed grad school). I spent the first 18 months working in a department with significant understaffing, low pay, constant turnover of staff, and essentially, a toxic environment. I transferred to a new department almost 4 months ago within the same company, after hearing more positive comments about the department. The position offered what I thought would be more growth opportunities for a slightly higher pay. The position I transferred to is newly created, and consists of 3 different job components at 2 different locations. When I initially started the position, there was also a lot of disorganization between administrators about my schedule, roles, etc. The disorganization also led to mass confusion for other things, and resulted in unethical situations occurring for me as a new employee, nearly 3 times since I started. This resulted in administration having to mediate several conflicts, which has been overwhelming too. As my position is also such a “hybrid” position of multiple components, I have a “main” supervisor, but 4 other supervisors also. Unfortunately though, given how mixed my position is across 2 buildings, none of my supervisors truly understand the challenges of my position. Additionally, space has been an issue at both buildings for my position, as it took me nearly 3 months to get a functional desk and filing cabinet at one of the buildings. I am also the youngest in my department, and the majority of my coworkers are all 10-40 years older than me, so I don’t have much in common with any of them. Additionally, since my workload is very “different” than theirs, I frequently choose to work during my lunch, instead of eating with my coworkers, at one of my locations, which my “main” supervisor told me is bothering some of my coworkers there, as I’m not “socializing” with them, even though I remain cordial throughout the day to them. The reason I work during my lunch is that I can’t finish my workload within the allotted time of the day, which my supervisor thought was “unusual”, and does not think I have a "high workload" (which isn't true).
To be completely honest, the stress of having to “navigate” through this chaos has been very difficult to deal with. I had a meeting today with my “main” supervisor to discuss how things in my position have been during the first few months (it was not a formal performance evaluation). Although my “main” supervisor gave me some positive feedback, she expressed additional concerns I didn't expect to hear, including that some staff at one of my locations have said that I am “too negative” and “complain too much”. My supervisor also implied that given my minimal work experience compared to my coworkers, it is expected in some areas of my job that I should have “more independent skills”, and should not need so much “supervision” (even though I don’t feel like I’m heavily supervised, and find most of the staff to be very unapproachable when asking questions). I have been doing a lot of continuing education on my own time to assist with furthering my knowledge, and occasionally asking for help, as needed, but now feel “shamed” for asking for any help, and feel even more alone in the position. I have mentioned several times that related information is not always clearly conveyed to me, which has caused some knowledge gaps, and that I need more explicit directions to be given, but this never happens. I am also getting the vibe that the department wishes they hired someone with more work experience than me, and that they regret hiring me. The department feels like they have given me a lot of “support”, but in reality, that isn’t the case. I have tried to advocate for what I need to be successful within this position several times, but given that I have been told I am "complaining too much", I’m feeling very conflicted now with what to do, and am thinking of maybe resigning altogether (even if I don’t have a job lined up yet).
Does anyone have any suggestions on how to deal with this situation? I don’t want to be a “job hopper” necessarily either, and had a very mixed vibe of this job since the first day I started, but really didn’t expect all of the same issues of my old job to follow to my new job either (staffing shortages, etc), but I guess it’s just the culture of the company….
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