A few years ago I left a job I’d had for 20 years for a job with a state agency. I wasn’t familiar with the type of work and stated that in my interview. I was still hired though. I knew I’d have to work hard to demonstrate my abilities & hopefully earn respect. It’s state government so I knew raises weren’t on the table. I haven’t been disappointed there.
I am the lone procurement person for my agency. I handle all purchases for offices across the state. After I was hired, we started to integrate a new computer system that would keep track of all transactions. My workload increased dramatically. I’m basically catching the agency up and doing things that were never done before. Training has been minimal. I regularly work 50 hour weeks just to keep up. I come in early, stay late, never take lunch, and come in on weekends. I never miss a day of work. Because of my lack of experience, I’m not an ideal employee. However, I think my effort has been pretty damn good.
I know I’m not going to get compensated & I know I’m not going to get praise. I didn’t think I’d be ridiculed by my supervisor. I’m routinely called “stupid” for my efforts. “He came in this weekend. He’s stupid” I overhear from management a lot. Management! I accept every assignment I’m given, but I’m stupid for doing so? What thinking am I not understanding? Am I wrong for trying to take ownership of my job? Am I wrong for working hard? How am I supposed to complete the assignments I’m given if I don’t work extra? I’m literally doing things that provide work for 5 accounts payable people. How do I keep up? At my previous job, I was accomplished. I was great at what I did. The qualities that made me good there only bring me ridicule now. What am I missing?
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